february dump ?

i feel like my entire time here in toronto, 1 year and 11 months and some days until my best friend's birthday lol :-(, i've been in this transitional space where i'm really just waiting for things to pass. i think i felt this more keenly during my walks with my sister during summer cus the path we took was always lined with reeds and tall grass that it felt like we were the only ones around all the time idk like i #jinjja felt like i was walking through purgatory biding my time until my soul disintegrates or something anyway whatever.

we're leaving first week of march maybe that's why february feels so much like the fastest zipline across the world, like i'm out of the foyer and time's actually moving again and something's about to happen. it's so weird.

watched cosmic princess kaguya yesterday with my sister. best thing i've watched this year i love the art style + the plot is fun and super cool + iroha and kaguya are so sunwon-coded they're the cutest it was just an overall amazing experience 10/10 on my anilist immediately. but also it reminded me of THE sunwon fic of all time, dreaming of a sun-kissed life, im still not over it really #triggerphrase #triggermedia so i actually hate cosmic princess kaguya ! thankfully it didn't end like dreaming of a sun-kissed life though i can't have forever is a feeling (album) and spring day by bts and mortal by enhypen and kahel na langit by maki and fuckass about you by the 1975 dominating my monthly spotify listening again..

but im stupid and a chronic wallower so i actually listened to mortal first thing after finishing the movie so it jus reminded me of eech's short heewon songfic/drabble using mortal.. duck smoking gif

why do things have to change (worse,,, end.. gulp dun dun dun !!!) lol i actually don't care if the transience is what makes things special ! even forgetting and not being affected anymore/moving on is a different pain/grief altogether

whatever anyway happy news !! my favorite heewon socmed au writer whose acc has been closed ever since i discovered them recently came online and tweeted abt missing heewon.. #lifeisgood #feelingblessed genuinely made my day cus their heewon is peak like they get my vision so bad ! also my bestfriend might pick me up from the airport :-) #YEYEYEYY hopefully all our friends are free for an early dinner #plsplsplsplspls

i need to think of an airport fit soon !!

i'll miss toronto i think. i feel like i'll miss my mom too, regardless of how she was the entire time we were under the same roof. i'll miss poong moon TT genuinely the best seafood champong of all time you're really my goat poong moon.. most of all i'll miss u value village @ 1525 victoria park avenue #goat

i hope i find the kuromi plush keychain my bestfriend gave me before i leave #praying